Monday, 22 August 2016

Animation Smears And Spirtual Texts

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“First, the movement which is upwards and continuous. This signifies that they are borne inflexibly towards God.....Thirdly we consider in fire the quality of clarity, or brightness; which signifies that these angels have in themselves an inextinguishable light, and that they also perfectly enlighten others”





"Surely, the disbelievers will be in the torment of hell to abide therein forever. [The torment] will not be lightened for them, and they will be plunged into destruction with deep regrets, sorrows and in despair therein. We wronged them not, but they were the wrongdoers. And they will cry: 'O Malik! Let your Lord make an end of us!' He will say: 'Surely, you shall abide forever.' Indeed we have brought the truth to you, but most of you have a hatred for the truth."







The dragon[a] stood on the shore of the sea. And I saw a beast coming out of the sea. It had ten horns and seven heads, with ten crowns on its horns, and on each head a blasphemous name. 2 The beast I saw resembled a leopard, but had feet like those of a bear and a mouth like that of a lion. The dragon gave the beast his power and his throne and great authority. 3 One of the heads of the beast seemed to have had a fatal wound, but the fatal wound had been healed. The whole world was filled with wonder and followed the beast. 4 People worshiped the dragon because he had given authority to the beast, and they also worshiped the beast and asked, “Who is like the beast? Who can wage war against it?”




"I am better than him. You created me from fire and created him from clay."







"The Messenger of Death will not touch you; in this way, you shall cross over the terrifying world-ocean, carrying others across with you."

Ezekiel, like all prophets except Moses, has beheld only a blurred reflection of the divine majesty, just as a poor mirror reflects objects only imperfectly





having solid black eyes, having a shoulder span measured in miles, and carrying hammers "so large, that if all of mankind tried at once to move them a single inch, they would fail". When they speak, tongues of fire come from their mouths. If one answers their questions incorrectly, one is beaten every day, 



 a great and mightie marques, and commeth abroad in the likenes of a woolfe, having a serpents taile, [vomiting] flames of fier; when he putteth on the shape of a man, he sheweth out dogs teeth, and a great head like to a mightie [night hawk];


or behold I am Understanding and science dwelleth in me; and the heavens oppress me. They cover and desire me with infinite appetite; for none that are earthly have embraced me, for I am shadowed with the Circle of the Stars and covered with the morning clouds. My feet are swifter than the winds, and my hands are sweeter than the morning dew. My garments are from the beginning, and my dwelling place is in myself








The locusts looked like horses prepared for battle. On their heads they wore something like crowns of gold, and their faces resembled human faces. 8 Their hair was like women’s hair, and their teeth were like lions’ teeth. 9 They had breastplates like breastplates of iron, and the sound of their wings was like the thundering of many horses and chariots rushing into battle. 10 They had tails with stingers, like scorpions, and in their tails they had power to torment people for five months
Then I saw a Lamb, looking as if it had been slain, standing at the center of the throne, encircled by the four living creatures and the elders. The Lamb had seven horns and seven eyes, which are the seven spirits of God sent out into all the earth.




all images found on http://animationsmears.tumblr.com/ 

Sunday, 14 August 2016

terrible vveapon

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http://retrovania-vgjunk.blogspot.co.nz/2016/08/aliens-commodore-64.html

Sorry kids that I don't post as much as I used.
Find it harder to concentrate on writing stuff than I used to. Not sure why.
But , like, have you seen the wealth of content on other blogs these days?
You can get so so much diy d&d "weird osr" that I feel comfortable reclining reptile like into the background.

FOR EXAMPLE:
http://maziriansgarden.blogspot.co.nz/

"But the jungle has now been abandoned by Zyan above. The visitors no longer come. All but four of the hanging pagodas stand empty and derelict. Each of these is occupied by one of the four remaining hanging merchants of Zyan"

http://gloomtrain.blogspot.co.nz/ 

"A single strand of it, teased free and tied around the finger, wrist, or neck of a victim, ensures their compliance in all things; so long as the strand is still attached to her head, the witch can command it to sever the member around which it is tied"


http://rememberdismove.blogspot.co.nz/
"Ice lice. The size of small dogs. Mostly live on mammoths and other huge mammals. Will drain a human dry in under a minute, then crowd around the corpse trying to figure out why it doesn't have any more blood in it"
http://renfieldscat.blogspot.co.nz/
"Prototype staff members. Bodies halfway carved into dolls."

http://dandy-in-the-underworld.blogspot.co.nz/

"Kalkiskordivaay, Marchioness of the Wormwood Star. Appears as a leopard with the head of a woman of no mean appearance, her red-gold hair oddly cast in the light of a crown of pale green fire."


http://gameswithothers.blogspot.co.nz/
"Ix is between death and life, her daughters dead or missing, her city a sepulchre beneath which she weeps eternal rivers of poison and forgetfulness. The rivers flow forever, into our own waters. They remind us of death and we die or go mad.
Her city and our first home, treasure trove, altar and throne of the best god, is lost to all but the dead and those unlucky enough to be invited."
http://whatwouldconando.blogspot.co.nz/

"for the alzabo will have all the feelings the father had towards the child in addition to wanting to eat and make company of their memories. This is not a parroting of the sounds and mannerisms, it is perfect and sincere"


http://elfmaidsandoctopi.blogspot.co.nz/
"
55 Giant termite mounds
56 A thousand or so easily offended frogmen in huge spawning pit
57 A pyramid of moss covered skulls
58 Duckmen guarding a pillar of unbreakable metal
"
http://basicredrpg.blogspot.co.nz/
"From a distance it looks like an enormous fox. From a distance it looks like an enormous crow. Close up it is obviously neither. It is a thing trying to be a couple things. Its skin is fluid and ink. When it moves it sort of...shapes itself in that direction. Stretching and blurring"

As I just went through these to quickly find an example of the magic there I found pages and pages of content I haven't had time to read let only digest and shit I'm sorry guys I hope your writing brings you joy as now all our attention is stretched so thin that you don't get the accolades you deserve.

(I will keep mentioning other blogs that I've stumbled on or forgotten to mention in future posts)


(I mean yeah there's that blogs I follow thing on the side here but I can barely remember how to follow a blog in blogger and it's glitchy as shit anyhow)

he-man screen cap


plus the ones I'm just making real sure you know about but would be real surprised if you didn't
http://roll1d12.blogspot.co.nz/
http://goblinpunch.blogspot.co.nz/
http://middenmurk.blogspot.co.nz/
http://straitsofanian.blogspot.co.nz/


WHERE IS WAR'S HORSE? IS IT SMA
LL? IS THAT WHY HE's SULKING ?
Arnold Böcklin
yes
anyway
content
stealing this straight outta Displacer Klaus's bag here:


TERRIBLE WEAPONS

1. Gravity Lances:
Gravity as in severe , gravity as in an exorable force , these lances are very long and stretch through time and space and are made of moments.
The knights begin their charge towards each other , each part of their lance a specific moment in time and space (the king lives, the kings dies, a mountain is formed, a child is lost , a city burns) and the final impact is resolved at the same time as each of the individual moments, the lances themselves like horrible fractal quicksilver nightmare mirrors, the knights; like a black sun eating the sky  like a buzzing fly instead your eyeball.

2. Shark tooth house:
A dolls house of teeth , thrown at someone it, it swallows them, cutting deeper and deeper the longer they take to find their way out.

3. Land Mine:
Like those dirtballs in Tank games, this gross looking tree cone (as Casuarina or Banksia but moving slowly like dying baby birds) spews out dank soil when impacted, filling and probably entombing a 2 metre cube .

4.Final Word Knife: 
If you stab someone with this knife, (appearing like Cinquedea sharpened down to a sliver) , it will kill them. Not necessary then , but eventually, no matter how later, no matter what seeming other cause, the death will always be claimed to you via this knife , in every book and cosmic writ.

5. Murder Tree:
Like a 2.5 metre dead tree if trees claimed brittle metal as their substance and not wood. It blurs and twists but never quite when you look at it, always like it was just before you looked. Like noticing raindrops or ants moving in grass.
It's heavy but the weight is carried by Wisdom not Strength. It will crush, impale, flay and tear. Then  carry parts lamenting and twitching off  your defeated enemies.
These trophies will only cease when rotted to bone.
Until then, they remain continually unreachable in the razor thickets , like Tantalus grapes.
These were first brought to earth by angels and can be still found used by them.
photograph by Toni Frissell, for more info click this



Friday, 15 July 2016

Laughter In The Woods

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Kiel wanted this:
A list of weird and decadent (but gameable) fey/fairy pass-times and ritual

in exchange he going to never use a reaction gif again   he is going to make a big list of all the sweet sentai monsters



Needle Dancing :

the folk have really long needle shoes (5-6 metre) and circle or folk dance in a glade.

Trespassers or rule breakers are sometimes sentenced to survive a dance in middle of the glad, risking constant impalement. The more they can predict the dance movements the less they get stabbed. "Attending" the dance in full anuls whatever grudge is held against.

Use: players need to atone for something, or they need to risk someone or rig it so they survive it.




Moon Cloaks:

a moon cloak makes the wearer look like whatever the viewer is expecting to see while also making the viewer very suggestible at the same time. 
They are made by collecting moonlight reflected in particular water sources; everything from a hoof print to a lake. Special scissors are needed and the craft is only known to a few. 
It has to be done in one night and moon cloaks vanish if exposed to daylight. If this happens then the next night everything one within a cat stroll range will have nightmares and physically experience them.

Use: as a nightmare bomb, or as escorting mission helping a folk around to the particular sequence of reflecting sources needed. An encounter; the fey in question might be forbidden to practise the craft because of traditions and offers someone bribe to the players if the keep shuttum. The bribe will prob get them in more trouble however. 
Or an apprentice nightstitcher offers to make the players a mooncloak but it goes kinda wrong the whole time and all the reflecting surfaces are acting as portals to random weird semi-planes after the moon has been cut from them.

Arnold Böcklin - Der Krieg from wiki commons

WILD HUNTS
the classic. Everyone gets a horrible animal mask everyone gets a horrible horse with human features and some horrible dogs with the faces of everyone you betrayed . Then they ride around on a moonless night or the solstice or for justice and hunt down the criminal , maybe just find someone and  make up the laws afterwards?

Use: can the players get to the hunted before the hunters?
Or being hunted. Or being doing the knock out a couple of dudes in the back and take their clothes and then try and blend in.


BESTEST!
the beaver or the ant? who the better builder? better have a competition. Better just fuck up the place with the beavers making more and more dams and the ants make more mounds and all the folk strutting around making notes. 
Or any other animal trait that can be compared to another animal. Best weaver, singer , swimmer etc. 

Use: generally gets way out of hand and will need judges or some one to step in and just stop it because the spider is trying to trap the moon and the fox death to prove who is craftest.



BOUNTYS
do you animals have laws? Well they don't but that doesn't mean the fey can't post bountys for whoever stole honey from the bees or ruined the rabbits dance.

JOUSTING:
atop beetles along a single strand of human hair
on human back along a frozen lake
on flocks of crows atop the trees
Or each knight in a different persons eye leaping from eye to eye


SHAPE WAR

like the classic sword in the stone Merlin vs Morgana each battler takes a form to defeat the other.
Someone starts as a wolf , their opponent turns in a lion , so the other a thorn , to that a locust.

Often with a unspoken subrule like each form must be prettier than the last or abstract concepts always lose to specific obscure animal taxidermy


FORTUNES FOOL 
someone is chosen, someone prob having a blameless life or maybe a pompous ass ? Anyway their life is about to get a lot more interesting , as they are now the basis for a wager!
The 2 contestants work together to make them  win and lose a fortune 3 times within the time limit (a day, a week, a month , a candle).
Their temperament at the end of the game is the thing actually bet upon. So one will be aiming to have them sad and other happy. Or possibly less binary and more obscure emotions.
Depending on what kind of sport this person is they might be allowed to keep the fortune and/or be with an additional blessing or curse.




Friday, 3 June 2016

ELEMUNTALS , Goop

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the definition of elements changes with time .
  How or why and if theory creates the facts or facts just wander around their own is a question without any definite , or, more importantly , an interesting answer at this time.

The elemental planes exist outside of time so when one them shifts into the official canon it retroactively inserts itself so it's always been that way.

If the elementals are aware of this , their massive sense of importance will prevent them admitting it.

Anyway Elemuntals are elementals for things that are not going to see an inclusion in anyones understanding of the fundamental nature of things anytime soon. 

                                    GOOP

Jun seo Hahm

Goop is the stuff that appears on a kitchen bench in a damp flat. Goop is anything with questionable providence. It's not quite from something alive or previously alive , it's too gross to just be a product of minerals and water, you want to slime it but you really don't.

While slime is happily a lurking acid, a life that has hunger and nothing more complicated that that, a comrade of disease and corruption, goop is just.. there.

It lacks purpose, it lacks hunger , it wanders in and out of the properties of animate and inanimate .

It erodes boundaries however. It can and will split up into distinct entities and recombine them later.
Maybe into 2 goop elemuntals maybe all but one will burst into regular goop.

It's only dangerous when it touches you ,decides it is you or is part of you , tries to move past you or generally gets in the fucking way.

Its temperament is vague, confused, slightly anxious, and muddled.  Like someone deliberately being dumb to get on your nerves but also with the impression that it will burst into tears.



The effect of touching it :

1.  Confused location , as a Blink spell until they look at a map
2. 1d4 major organs and possessions switch functions, so their hat is responsible for their blood moving around they body
3.Random limb becomes independent and develops its own personality. Until it gets a name.
4. A chuck of flesh wanders off somewhere. 5 hitpoints worth. Eat it if you want that back.
5. Player of character struck now controls Goop Elemuntal. Player to their left controls their character.
Lasts until someone drops a die or knocks something over.
6.Damage done to character also comes out of their exp. Lasts until some other too-clever mechanic messes with their exp as well.
7. All worn possessions become part of body. Lasts until they part themselves so they look nude.
8. Random possession melts becomes part of Goop Elemuntal. Goop Elemuntal gets its properties
9. Goop Elemuntal gains 1d10 of your hitpoints.
10. You gain 1d10 of the Goop Elemuntals hitpoints
11. You gain its memory of the last 2 days.  People tend to remember the Goop Elemuntal in the background in memories of you from now until basically forever.
12. It disappears in them and reappears an hour later





Wednesday, 18 May 2016

Hell Knights

Print Friendly Version of this pagePrint Get a PDF version of this webpagePDF Knights are terrible and are a rudimental example how the nature of human society  is a process of  choosing  the least unpredictable but still terrifyingly dangerous thug to extort you with a protection racket.
And by choose I mean.. prob something quite unlike what we normally think of "choice" and more like "harrowing extremes of desperation"

Anyway knights are terrifying assholes with weapons and armour that cost more than your village (the people anyway) and exemplify the moral identity of your culture while more or less operating above it.

At their very best they keep bad things from happening to you because of their potential to do bad things back. Hopefully at worst things , or atleast far away things.


Some of the time they will  do bad things to you. This will be your fault.

At the worst  they do bad things to you because they can .  The idea of knights is still more important than you so whatever happened to you doesn't matter.

Hell Knights are worse. Somehow. Maybe it's because people can learn to accept and understand why knights are important and why they do things. Hell Knights you will never be able to.
 Yet ,somehow , their nature makes you want to accept their actions as just and reasonable even as the unsense of them snakes in you like cold rotten oil.


Maybe some created them as a "dark mirror" , to make people realise how shitty knights are.  If someone did this for this , there is only a sliver of success in it.

Maybe they are result of a concept diffusing to its furthest point.

Or just demons in mocking iconoclasticism, or devils in insidious  mummery .

Maybe they are a bit of Nothing dressing up as the world and getting it wrong.


DRYDROWNING : domain : interzones: fog , tide, twilight Punishes the unvigilant , the vulnerable, the unprepared Those that will drag others down when they drown
Wields: Isolation , Crushing thine mantle:  salted and moaning iron
WRACK: domain: broken things that spread their breaks ; dams, exhausted fields, fallen borders punishes: the neglected and the neglecting  wields: crack hammer, entropy thine mantle: choke coal

WARFLOWER: domain: shifting borders, no man's lands, contested and conquested land punishes: the victors at rest wields: fields of broken blades, weapon womb thine mantle: brittle blade hide


GRIMGUARD domain: tombs, monuments punishes : remembrance , irreverence wields: grindtongue, winds of loss thine mantle: heart chilling stone


THE HOOK: domain: promises, roads punishes: the trusting, the confident wields: your words, hooked needle and fate thread thine mantle: organ seeking horror hair




GORILLASLOUGH: domains: feasting, the leftbehind punishes:the lazy, the hungry, the desperate , the indulgent wields: wasting hands , the devouring of air thine mantle: ablative sick glazen dough

Thursday, 5 May 2016

YOU ARE HOME

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Mole Moles
oh no it's not a mole on your skin it's a mole it moves around and is hairier than usual but with softer hair.
They eat parasites and infections so if you have made a bunch of saving throws against them recently you prob have Mole Moles. Oh god . Some of these moles are actually spies for Jubilex. So they are mole mole moles.



Organ Snakes
As a form of organ replacements snakes are fine. Everyone knows this. However they require special care and maintenance.

Brain : Any time you take a direct approach to something you need to make a saving throw or lose a point of intelligence. If you let your snake out at night it will eat books. This means you have read the book. There is no accounting for the taste of a snake though.

Liver: any successful save vs poison heals you 1d4 hitpoints. Poison never really tastes that bad or unusual to you.

Stomach: After a big meal you can sleep for a week. Chewing food  before swallowing it will make you nauseous.

Heart: You don't ever really get that excited or frightened.

Kidneys: You piss causes plants to die.

Womb: Snake or mostly snake babies.

Lungs:  No-one hears you breathing. Whenever you specifically tell people that you are telling them the truth it sounds really suspicious



"Meat"

It's just meat , what does it do? it's red it's not organs or muscle how did it get here? It's an IOU a flesh elemental is borrowing your particulars they'll be back any moment.








Friday, 29 April 2016

Life

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From the Bat Labels tumblr, it's a death bee. Queen of the death bees in fact.


The book Evolving the Alien defines life as anything capable of Self Replication , Mutation , and Hereditary  (paraphrasing a little here).

So while fire can reproduce , the "child" fire will only have properties from its immediate environment , so it's not alive, as per the defination.

Computer viruses* reproduce , have hereditary but don't mutate by themselves, unless you count human beings reworking them or modifying them as a form of reproduction and mutation.. in which case I guess they count as alive for this definition.
Conventional virii rely on repurposing another living entity for reproduction so if you want to accept their edge-caseness , using a human brain as form sex organ is just a step further.


*I'm possibly well out of date here with how this work so inform me if I am

The book offers a hypothetical extreme example of magnetic vortices on the surface of the sun as an possibility of a  life form.

(I can't remember it well enough to explain how that works sorry)

and today's post (actually been sitting around in draft form for weeks) is about making other extreme lifeforms in elfgames

DUNGEON:

(there's like 3-4 blog posts and threads that have all blurred together in my head and I can't credit the originator exactly, but yes , this idea has previous precedence)

Dungeonea is a negative lifeform. Its structure is absence , its metabolism chronovorical , its gametes erasural.
Its seed will potentially germinate on anything hidden or lost , especially in enclosed negative space ; a basement , cave , or pit.
 From there its metabolism rides on the process of time , "speeding things up" , the walls erode out  , the geological tick-tock hastens, and notable , more history becomes to have happened.

(it's important to note in a world with magic , the act and fact of the observation of reality is a much of a viable substrate as the solid lumpy bits are)

So an ordinary basement , can , depending on the exact* species of Dungeonea in it , can with a generation grow an abandoned thieves hideout, a murder cult church , and a cave bear lair.

Dungeonea hijack speculation, local mythology,  and folk history in their metabolic process, in the same way a tree will pull CO2 out of the air and H20 out of the ground to craft its bulk.

Part of their phenotypical capabilities are to redirect the lost or desperate towards themselves. I.e beings  that might think it a  reasonable thing to hide out in a horrible damp cave.
Things that have no agency of their own (ie objects) can be relocated to itself if no-one is actually sure of where exactly they are, in a form of behind the scenes metaphysical ledgermayne.

Anyone stashing or hiding anything near a Dungeon risks memory loss or confusion about where they placed the thing concerned. After a while the thing will then be found in the Dungeon itself.

The Dungeon benefits from this by the creation of further rumour, mythology and history making, micro and macro nutrients to it.

Anything taken from a Dungeon can convincingly seed another: wealth , legendary weapons or trophies etc from a Dungeon that get  lost or secreted away in a suitable environment have a high chance of germinating another.

To aid this , like the over-consummation of fruit hastening the voiding of a swallowed seed, such things tend to encourage asociality, risk taking, exploration, greed and paranoia. (the source of talk of "cursed treasure" or dragon's tainted gold)

Different genus of Dungeonea differ from each other in the speed which they grow , the seamlessness (or lack thereof)  into their surroundings, and the degree of physiologically effects on the population (retro-active mythologising, hoarding, culting forming, abandonment of children ) or the degree of "taint" on objects taken from there.


*I was going to try and map out the Domain , Kingdom , Phylum etc of Dungeonea with the Domain being Negative Space Lifeforms, the Kingdom being Architectural, and the Phylum being one that manipulates history; however it threatened to become a paralytically explosive form of speculation so Arnold can do it.

SPELLS

Spells most notable "phenotype" is of course a rearrangement of reality in the form of More Fire or Less Alive People  etc.  Most of the time they live inside the inflicted wizards brain , jealously guarding their patch of mental territory

Mental territory is either the prime juicy realm of  a "memorized" spell, which can be cast, or the scratchy barren realms of a  "known" spell, of which a wizard has familiarized themselves with but can't currently cast.

(it should be noted , that yes, doing more than most cursory skim read any spell risks it then permanently having a presence in wizards brain despite no formal memorization happening.)


Most spells currently in use by wizards are a satisfactory balance between usefulness (the spells effect) and in-mind aggressiveness.
 In much the same way most gardens and farms are comprised of crops known to be not poisonous, not evasive , and relatively hardy and pest resistant.

The common spells also demands a  proportionate amount of mental space for its effects. A level 3 spell uses up a level 3 slot. etc

However there is nothing innate to a spells possible nature that means it has be well behaved, reasonable or viable.

Rogue , weed, parasite, trap ,pest etc  spells are known . Ones that happily bully every other spell out of a wizard's head, or intercept an intention and make themselves cast instead.
 Some appear to be a routine Unseen Servant or Floating Disc but are complete brutes in regards to other spells and will carve out the space that otherwise would be commandeered by a 2nd ,3rd or even 5th level spell  .

Some are known to even make more room available for themselves if the wizard otherwise doesn't have the casting level, repurposing mental resources used for  memory, body functions, or aspects of the wizards identity for itself.

Other mutants and rogue spells work the other way. They attempt to out compete other spells in selection by the wizard using less mental resources (spell "slots) for more effect (higher level). However , there is no such thing as a free lunch. These varieties tend to do permanent damage to the wizard or the nature of reality around the wizard.

Anytime a wizard learns a spell (by which meaning: familiarizes themselves with a spell in a transcribed form well enough to know its game effects) there is a minute risk a reproduction error will creep in , in the same way our own reproduction is subject to. Most wizard training is about minimizing and deleting these "errors" so spells stay pretty much the same.

However self taught wizards, disreputable or deliberately iconoclastic schools run a much higher risk of translation errors.

In conclusion spells can be said to be asexual reproducers . A "sexual"* reproduction also exists, the striking of inspiration that harbingers a wizard creating a new spell.

 This rare event results in spells that tend to be better behaved than rogues or mutants, but still, extreme  caution should  is  used .
\This why the lexicon of spells is a relatively static affair .





*though a far more of a chaotic free for all of trait assignment that a diploid chromosomal affair  . Which , how many, and how much any spell is involved in the pregeneratory of a new spell is impossible to say.




.....


I wound up writing that in a particular voice and that was kinda weird. I had some more ideas which I might expand on later
(

Rock statues , gargoyles : crap that looks appropriate around the place but suffers from too much attention. Sometimes becomes murderous

 Cloud vortexs : reasons why the weather makes no goddamn sense around here/ being parasited by a cloud

Storms , wave mazes: ditto for spooky islands

Gravity Coral : Floating solid stuff that makes horrible space holes and space treasure

)


But for now some game effects for rogue spells:

(NOTE: I think I made this game effect too invested in making statistically accurate results for the game world, so if you just like effects the generate more game relevance  just change it to stat check or roll on mutation table)
(EDIT: I think Arnold's table fits the text better , and is also his usual standard of great ,so have a look at that too

When a wizard looks at spell well enough that the g.m can go "it's a fireball but it does 4d6 damage and uses bees" it will live their head. Prob in a pathetic form that will never get the chance to do anything, unless the wizard is not in their right mind, trained by maniacs, or the spell is a dangerous rogue variant.

It also risks  the spell mutanting slightly. In a well trained and healthy wizard mind in regards to a tried and tested spell the chance is about 1 in 10,000.
this risk only happens the first time the spell is known and then again when it is memorized.

However the following increases the chance by a decimal each:
-wizard is high, suffering from prolonged stress or deprivation,  drunk, concussed, mentally ill or otherwise "not right" (more than one can apply)
-memorizing rather than just perusing
-spell is an 'unstable' variant*
-wizard is self taught
-school of magic practised is  gauche , thuggish or 'avantgarde'

so a drunk gauche-schooled wizard memorizing a conventional fireball has a 1 in 100 chance of having a spell mutant when memorizing it for the first time. If they were sleep deprived as well a 1 in 10.  And then furthermore if the spell was Unstable , a 100% chance (or if you prefer , a 9 in 10 chance )

*as indicated by something like "this scroll has an unstable version of a fireball spell" etc. Also there are some Very Unstable spells which roll for mutation every time they are memorized.


THIS SPELL HAS MUTANTED! Or permanently damaged the casters brain
But it is a small matter!
1. Some aspect of the wizards personality is always apparent , like the spell is gaudy and overly showy or involves a disportionate amount of skulls. Anyone passingly familiar with them will be able to recognise such a spell as being cast by them.
2. The spell has cross infected another !Roll a mutation for another spell the wizard has memorized.
3. Double the duration, effect or range of the spell, whatever seems the less relevant and half whatever of them is the most relevant. Randomly determine if unobvious.
4. If caster has any spell disrupted this spell is immediately cast instead.
5. Spell is insecure! Caster now can't speak the name or describe any other spell  they know or have ever heard of. Charades or opaque descriptions is okay. The spell will prob catch on to nicknames for other spells though.
6. The spell is eager to please but prone to passive aggression. If the spell is cast first in a day , you may reroll and keep the best of any one roll to do with the spell. If it is not the first spell you cast in this day , one roll to do with it is rerolled and the worst result used
7. You may instantly rememorize this spell if you knock a wizard unconscious , destroy a scroll or spellbook.
8.  This spell manages to look a lot like it's doing the opposite to what it is actually doing.
9. It will leave (additional) lingering traces of its use, such as eldritch markings, fruity smells, cold patches, unnatural plant growth etc. The host wizards personality tends to shape such a thing.
10 roll on next table

 I guess of concern but not unduly
1.  Spell casts itself twice, second time random target
2.  This spell is always "chosen" to be memorized when selecting spells
3.  Wizard loses all memory of childhood.
4.  If player stalls for too long when declaring action, their character casts this spell if able
5.  A random animal nearby begins to detest the host wizard
6. Minor nose bleed and major auditory hallucinations whenever spell is cast
7. Random stat is reduced by 3 points whenever spell is not currently memorized.
8. Spell teaches you one secret of anyone the host wizard successfully casts it on
9.  After casting the spell a unidentifiable mass of semi-animate flesh must be dug out of skin later or infection will result
10 roll on next table

..well yes Could be worse I suppose
1.

2.  Every time this spell is cast the nearest unborn animal mutants significantly

3. Host wizard will always make this spell available to someone else on request , stopping anything they currently are doing to facilitate a transcription.

4. Spells effect for the next casting will change nightly to the most impressive spell effect host wizard has been witness to each day. However it remains still at its level of potency, so it might be level 1 version of fly or such like.

5. Spell will bud off into 1d4 half strength versions of itself whenever cast.  (1 means as "normal") . Random targets will be assigned unless host wizard can quickly assign them.

6. Spell upon cast will make way more noise and light than is ever conceivably  necessary and additionally alert anything sensitive to magic of the casters existence with  3 kilometers

7. Each time the spell is cast a random sense is halved in effectiveness and another one doubled.

8 Each time this spell is cast the nearest ghost or spirit has their memory altered so the host wizard significantly figures in it

9 Inflicts hitpoint damage to the wizard equal to itself level when cast. Damage happens at very end of round , if someone else takes this amount of damage due to the actions host wizard (due to this spell , an ongoing effect of a previous action e.g setting someone on fire or other circumstances) , host wizard does not take this damage , or atleast has the damage reduced by the amount inflicted.
10 roll on next table

oh buggery
1. The only language or speech the host wizard is capable of is saying is the spell's name

2. Double its effects but reduce host wizards level for anything other than spell casting and exp needed for next level by 2

3. Each time this spell is cast , a random dimensional interloper shows up the next day

4. 5% of the wizard's body disappears  when the spell is cast, as if they were a swiss cheese. Use this cumulative  percent as the chance that this kills them outright

5.  Casting any other spell does damage = its level

6 . Spell can be memorized as a level 1 spell but all other level one spells become Very Unstable when this is done.

7. Spell effect repeats 1d6 rounds later. If a 6 is rolled , reroll but repeats in minutes. If another 6 , hours.

8. Spell can change various aspects of itself to suit a  situation such as elemental type or the shape of its effect as negotiated by the caster to it.  It will now take a share of exp like a henchman however.

9 . Caster gains a random mutation each time spell is cast. If they start spamming this spell until they get something super good , make the spell develop  another mutation

10 Just fuck them up


Note anecdotal evidence suggests negative effects can be remedied or at least somewhat mitigated by the consummation of wizard brains and/or organ transplants