Monday, 19 February 2018

I want Rey and Patrick to argue about Crystals

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Patrick hates crystals and Rey is a weeaboo , therefore loves Final Fantasy and Final Fantasy has more crystals than a Rainbow Gathering.

I don't super have a side on this , so I'm just shooting at both sides here:

Here is some reasons crystals are bad:

-Google crystals in art, does your soul not writhe?

-lazy plot devices in weeaboo games

-Infact the ease of making a crystal appear special and potent in video games is prob to blame. Like it's just a vector drawing with the lighting way up and boom it's the groin-sauce of the gods themselves

-Dense association with new ageness, hippies, or soft pastel hipsters.

-Also rich people. Diamonds are shit, no one gives a fuck about your wedding ring Sharon, if you need an expert to tell you That yes This is Worth A lot of Money (as opposed to a cubic zircon or whatever)  But functionally it's the same, then it's fucking stupid . This goes for art too.

-That thing where someone is into crystals but doesn't really believes in them, but kind of ironically believes in them because #selfcare , but really it's them embracing other method which is does nothing and therefore can co-exist of with their identity , which is build around being powerless and ineffectual.

-Magic objects that haven't come off or from a living / not living body and/or look safe and nice .If objects aren't magic because you've driven nails into them and tied a goatsjaw bone covered in pepper and dung , but are glowing and have big gems , you are playing an mmo and we can't be having that sort of thing around here.

Here are some reasons crystals could be good:

 -They could be really , absurdly, spike and sharp.  If you use crystals it should be like nature, and nature is utterly indifferent to you and actually alien to you. Crystals should like they are going to kill you by accident and also you are going to have them break off in you and get into lungs and also you just ruined something that took 1000000 years to form

-Crystals that have a dangerous strangeness, an uncanniness suggested by their very structure. Too long , ordered but in chaotic heaps ways, emerging from other things like mold or fungus.

-Sure crystals forming out of blood or bone is good, but honestly this can still look naff if it's a generic looking purple irregular polygon.

So for a crystal to still be interesting , take something about it and go too far with it.

 image sources