Sunday 22 September 2013

unheimlich farm encounters

Print Friendly Version of this pagePrint Get a PDF version of this webpagePDF 1. Deflated cow
2.eyeless chickens,moving in perfect stop motion synchronicity
3.A Cat. Always the same size in relation to your perceptive, so the further away it is the bigger it is
4.Red Swans
5.Sheep sucking on bones
6.Crying magnificent bull
7.Ducks walking around on the bottom of the pond
8.Various people planted head down in the soil.
9.cabbage patch kids
10.whistling crows
11Softly breathing hay bales
12.Pigs shattered like porcelain
13.Too many pigs
14.Quiet, numerous, nocturnal goats
15.Rubberboned horse
16.Pipe smoking donkey
17.gravestones with the inscriptions just children's drawing
18.  House elves/brownies packed seamlessly cheek to jowl in every cupboard, nook, drawer and oven. Look at blankly at you until you close the door/drawer. Then breathly giggle. If provoked they swarm and tear off hunks of skin and hair with their clammy child like hands
19.A jolly farmer, with no family, animals , crops, tools, food, bedding, sheets, cups, bowls, pets, spare clothing, vases, ornaments, portraits, knick-knacks, seeds, etc.
20.Animals poorly disguised as each other

7 comments:

  1. I feel kinda dumb. I don't quite get 19. Is it that it's a jolly farmer with nothing but buildings and fields? everything empty and he's acting normal and happy?

    Fantastic list. I love 3, 4 and 17. 17 especially.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. yup, he has nothing but the clothes on his back with no visible means of support and he is acting like nothing is amiss

      Delete
  2. uhm number 13 sounds great tho

    ReplyDelete
  3. ARNOLD K WROTE THIS AND THEN I DELETED BY MISTAKE
    21. No pigs, just a vague, uneasy sense of pinkness.
    22. Tiny cows prancing around the ankles of obese ultrapigs, ten feet tall and bulletproof.
    23. Hovercows with no legs. They don't need them.
    24. Farmers packed into tiny stalls. Wife suckling some piglets.
    25. With a flourish, cornbread.
    26. Cow leisurely and methodically eating ducklings.
    27. Immortal, quadriplegic horse abandoned in flower bed.
    28. Withered goat that follows you whispering "I was once a man!" and "Take my place!"
    29. Well overflowing with murky water.
    30. A pony vomiting whole apples, constantly and noiselessly.

    ReplyDelete
  4. A sheep with a grotesquely large cranium sitting on an ornate high-backed throne in the middle of the barn, chuckling evilly.

    32. A woman giving birth in a sty, with the aid of tittering, fretful porcine midwives.

    33. The animals are laying siege to the farmer's house, with ladders, catapults, battering rams, rope and hatchets. On a nearby hill, silhouetted by the sunset, is the neighboring farmer, in full military garb, calmly watching on horseback.

    34. The farmhands and/or the animals are undead. This doesn't seem to be a problem.

    35. The fields are sprouting live human heads.

    ReplyDelete
  5. 36. The wheat in the fields gently sigh and lean towards you when you get close.

    37. A cat missing it's hind half - by a clean cut - walks by, much as if it was whole.

    38. Through the window, you can see the grim reaper having tea with the residents. When you get inside he is gone.

    39. The red barn is painted in blood.

    40. The fences are made of ivory.

    ReplyDelete
  6. 36. The wheat in the fields gently sigh and lean towards you when you get close.

    37. A cat missing it's hind half - by a clean cut - walks by, much as if it was whole.

    38. Through the window, you can see the grim reaper having tea with the residents. When you get inside he is gone.

    39. The red barn is painted in blood.

    40. The fences are made of ivory.

    ReplyDelete