The wonderful world of symbolic armour 4 : MEAT

Print PDF I'm tired and all kinds of diseased but now I have painkillers and a sleeping dog beside me and I can't be bothered seeing what format I did the other parasite armour posts in so here we go: No wait I did because it was easier somehow. I'm craving marshmellow based candy so bad right now it is worrying.



Meat:
growing meat stick on your meat keep all the pointy objects out.
Hoorah.
 Either reanimate with  necromancy and lax corpse disposal protocol or growned in vats or degenerate peoples that are so degenerate you can wear them as a helmet
 Advantages:

 You can eat it

Improved strength

Relatively easy to adapt to your system



Possible enhancements:
I Think I hate this format I'm just going to skip to the fun bits

Disadvantages:

Who can hook a girl up?

Necromancers or golem crafters that deal a specially with flesh. Cults. Always the cults. These ones worship a perfect cube of meat. Womb witches take carefully regulated doses of terragens in order to give birth to graftable components.
A people that are always born with a conjoined twin that they separate themselves from in a coming of age knife dual and then keep the bits of the twin around for trade/spare parts.
Dr Moreau types.



Specific Strains:

Saint homunculus:
 It's a little version of you inside you that suffers instead of you.
Any spells or maledictions  effect just the homunculus not you. Which might kill it as it has no special powers of regeneration or resistance. Despite its "saint" title , it fucking hates you , but lacks the strength to claw its way out, but if someone knows it is there , they can target it with beneficial magics , maybe empowering it to eat your heart. So .. watch out for that.

StingerCysts:
Cysts storing poisons, potions or acids , to be released from blunt trauma

 Viscerous Cloth:
like a fat suit but more of a hollowed out ogre you can climb inside and wear as an exoskeleton, but kinda the exact opposite of exoskeleton but not really I guess??

Black Milk:
Your milk production glands are replaced with something that duplicates a spell like charm person or web or melfs acid arrow. But via milk.
Let's presume there were no metaphors in Shakespeare just literals.


Matryoshka Kernel:
Is this even armour anymore, it's just turning into a list of body horror you can shop for. Anyway every time you come to a major decision point in your life, the type that forever shapes you in a different direction, 
 you grow a smaller you just under your skin. If you die, your outer layer peels away and a you that would of made the other decision steps out all naked and glistening and with actual memorys up until that point, and then hazy not real memorarys beyond that , as if they had been living out that alter life path you did not take.

The Wonderful World of Symbiotic Armour; Plants

Print PDF Plants!
They can grow on you or even inside you!
As symbiotes go they are not really that great at incorporating themselves in their hosts. Which also is a good thing. While fungus always threatens to take just a bit more and coral is a constant weight (physically and dynamically), plants are pretty upfront.
"we will do this for you, and when the time comes, we will take this"

Advantages: Photosynthetic. They will feed and heal you with the magic of the suns burning beams!
Less demanding of resources, often self contained!
Disadvantages: Will shut down or die without regular access to sunlight. Tend to be expensive when they finally want their due. Abilities tend to concentrated on the plant than in the hosts body

Possible enhancements: High velocity seed shootings. Thorny whips. Root hold fasts.

Who Can Hook a Girl  Up? All those vanilla woodland creatures in the monster books. Wyrd druids,  cults, ancient and forbidden grains. Seeds from the stars. Astral orchids needing roots on the physical plane.

Specifics Species:

Insinuate Frond: 
Okay there is these huge mountain sized flowers in the astral/ethereal plane and like real plants needing bacteria to fix nitrogen in the soil and making special nodules on their roots to give the bacteria a home, Insinuate Frond need to grow roots straight through your skull and out your eyes and assorted head holes.

The translucent shimmering tendrils enhance your senses but kind of fuck with them as well. Like you can see in the dark and get True seeing but you see everything in allegorically magic realism way or something. Like you might see someone as tiger person not because he is really a tiger but because he is fierce at heart. The d.m should basically just mess up descriptions of things for you all time.

You can get this by accepting the flowers offer in your dreams. The flowers don't really understand that people don't think of dreams as legally bonding.




Gravetree:
 This is some seeds that you eat and they live in your stomach for pretty much ever. When you die they immediately and rapidly convert your entire body into a tree , so some bad old necromancer can't use you for any magics or undead making. While the seeds are in you , you get +4 vs saves to necromatic magic and take half damage from any necromantic spells

Amberplate:
This is a tree helmet that secretes amber forming platemail but requires a hammer and chisel to get off


Sap Shooter:
This is a pitcher plant helmet that can also shoot sticky goo once a day

The Mulcher:
This one extends its thorny tendrils all over your body , forming armour. It can also shoot forth its thorn seeds which grow rapidly into thrashing thorny plants when striking flesh, striking as light crossbow and , if a reflex save is failed, then inflict 1d8 damage a round, unless removed with a strength check and additionally round of damage. It has enough ammo for one thorn shot, but will grow 2 more to replace that one after a successful kill is done with it. It will demand each thorn to be fired everyday with the intend of killing.


Trauma Blossom:
This is delicate tree that lives on your back and turns painful experiences into fruit, so you don't remember them. Eating the fruit causes the (re) living out of the experience . The tree only can convert experinces that happen while the tree has been on you unfortunately, but rumours of ethereal one that can extent it's roots into your past have been heard.