Friday 20 December 2013

Down From The Chimney His Sack Burst Forth

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Manticore is nearly here. Manticore brings people the things they dare ask for. DISPLACERKLAUS  however just brings shit no-one asked for.


no but seriously I'm doing this thing and I hate it and I'm not allowed to go on rambling incursions of pure bullshiting campaign speculation until I finish this thing. I fucking hate this thing. I have included pangolins so it's getting better.

For now DISPLACERKLAUS will fill in for me


H O HO HO I AM  DISPLACERKLAUS AND I'M NOT QUITE WHERE YOU THINK I AM 
HERE IS SOME VERY GOOD 
RPG TITLES

INFINITY PIG

Rod-Harvest

Melancholy in Sodom

Japes and Jackalweres


ManyGnome

The Bright Beast That Was

Devil's Bigness

Acclaims and Adverses 

Bogs and Bogs and Mud

Tome of Feuds

Ripe Tower

Hellbard

DIRTYPOOR

Night's Black Bosom 

Zharkz

Unbounded

Special Lady of War

Woeful Pits

Squalid Depths

Mad Giants Of Galaxy

REEKS OF MARS

PlagueWulves of the Unearth 

The Humongous 


what else do you have DISPLACERKLAUS?

RHYMING STUFF WITH ANIMAL NAMES TO MAKE MONSTERS!
A RANDOM TABLE
wow that is truly unwanted




1 Pikepike!
that is the first one and already it doesn't rhyme and some else made that joke
H O H O HO HO I STEAL AND LIE
2 Spear Bear!
3 Fog Frog!
4 Road Toad!
5 Mat Cat!
none of these deserve exclamation marks DISPLACERKLAUS
6 Mocktopus!
that's more of a punning word substitution  
7.Door Boar!
8.Chisel Horse!
9. Grappling Chicken!
10. A Bag of Wet Mice!
11. 2d6 goblins
12. flour
13. Hawk Stork!
this is going well DISPLACERKLAUS, so well. What else do you have?

THIS SOCIETY MAKES THE FOLLOWING ITEMS FROM BREAD!!

1.shoes.
2.doors
3.guard dogs
4. books
5. sling stones
6. hats
7. spouse lures
8. lower intestines
9. pauldrons
10.economic system


why all these tables are fucking stupid DISPLACERKLAUS
H O H O HO HO IM REALLY SLIGHT BESIDE WHERE YOU THINK I AM
REASONS THIS GHOST IS A GHOST
1. Ironic Suicide Pact Wager Contract
2. Murdered while impersonating a corpse
3. Drunk themselves to death. Literally, stuck a straw in a vein and slurped their way to death
4. The priest gave them shit directions to the afterlife
5. Actually an animated snowman made of ectoplasm
6. Legs fell off
7. Allergic to own skin
8. Shat heart out
9. Flying machine
10. Internal burial
11. bard

that's kind of an improvement

MUSIC!
WEAPONIZED INSTRUMENTS!
fuck you
1. Tuba launches squids
2. Organ fires blazing souls
3. Violin lacerates random target when played hard enough to break strings
4. Drums that explode
5. Flute that shoot poison needles
6. Piano that has extendable hammers when keys are pressed

BUUUH I'M ALREADY SICK OF THAT
NOW FOR A MECHANIC TO RESOLVE SEX IN RPG...
HAHAHHA HAA NO, EVEN I CAN'T GIVE A PRESENT THAT UNWANTED

POINTLESS ISLANDS!

1. The island of Crying Ducks
2.  The island of spare legs
3. The island of hot snow
4. The island with an ecosystem entirely made from centipedes
5. The island of geological unlikely rocks
6. The island of the pretend wizard
7. The island of miniature brontosaurus 
8. The island with low cloud cover
9. The island with the small volcano
10. The island where people bury their shadows
11. The island with upside down trees
12. The island that rains diamond
13. The island that smells like gas
14. The island that is entirely edible
15. The island that follows you


WELLL I'M NEARLY DONE FOR THE NIGHT JUST GOT THIS MONSTER LEFT:

CIMIM :
THEY ARE  LIKE MIMICS BUT THEY ALWAYS  TURN INTO SOMETHING REALLY UNLIKELY TO BE IN THE ENVIRONMENT 

I coulda sworn Cimim's already showed up in a post. Where did you get them from DISPLACERKLAUS?

H O H O HO HO I'LL JUST SEE MYSELF OUT OR WILL I BECAUSE I'M 3 FEET TO WHERE I THINK I AM?!?!


get out






2 comments:

  1. Fog Dogs
    Shaggy grey-wet blue eyed wolves, low slung with centipede-bodies twelve feet long and sixteen limbs. Jointed claws climb as the bodies writhe like snakes.

    ReplyDelete
  2. I like the piano. I'd put it on a Tenser's floating disc and drive around hitting people in/on the head.

    ReplyDelete