ANIMALS AND ALIGNMENTS
the only bad animals are pigeons and centipedes .
By pigeon I of course only refer to Columba livia domestica
cats are fine, except a lot of the time it's a person reincarnated as cat. The cats people talk way too much are actually their future soul prison send back in time.
These cats are terrible.
All primates should considered human , not animal, and thus judged by the same standards as we judge ourselves. So chimpanzees and monkeys are v.bad, but only by human internal standards.
By animal standards they are not animals , they are human.
This was mentioned previously.
Ants would be bad except fungus keeps them in line . However they are not to be trusted.
Wasps are bad but good inflicted on other animals, so this balances out.
Mosquitoes have killed more people than people have killed people , this counts as a good thing , ecologically speaking.
Ducks have been warned, but for now, are not bad.
Metaorganism such as corporations and some religions count as a subset(overset?) of human, and are not animal.
Future revisions might include them as virus .
Future revisions are considering have a 2 axis system , with Bad (Pidgeon) as the X axis and Bad (Centipede) as the Y axis.
GOING NO-WHERE SLOW
Instead of werewolves people turning in giant hands that crush people
Instead of Frankensteins A Very Large Toddler
Instead of The Mummy , A Murderous Painting that rests inbetween murders inside art and takes on different properties depending on what it just rested in
Instead of A Dracula , Sinister Spider Teen Gang
Instead of Fishman , the Ratking
Instead of Zombies, Skeletons that pull peoples skeletons out
WIKIPEDIA ENTRY ON BALOR OF THE ONE EYE :
"This eye wreaks destruction when opened. The Cath Maige Tuired calls it a "destructive" and "poisonous" eye that no army can withstand, and says that it takes four men to lift the eyelid. In later folklore it is described as follows: "It was always covered with seven cloaks to keep it cool. He took the cloaks off one by one. At the first, ferns began to wither. At the second, grass began to redden. At the third, wood and trees began to heat up. At the fourth, smoke came out of wood and trees. At the fifth, everything got red hot. At the sixth...... At the seventh, the whole land caught fire""
"The baneful eye was at him. This eye was opened only in the field of fight. Four persons were necessary to raise an eyelid of his eye by four polish rods passed through eyelids. The army which would look in this eye, could not resist, even if be in many thousands by number"."
VIDEO GAMES MYSTERY
"video games are a unique artform that can be used to tell stories in new and exciting ways"
->makes video game
->neglects or actively suppresses any video game aspect beyond what you would find on a next generation encarta
FOOD FOR THOUGHT
I mean the opposite of sub-realm would be a super-realm but why not call it a dom-realm
200 WORD RPG:
EVERYONE CATCHES RATS
PUT RATS IN BARREL. CLOSE BARREL . WAIT UNTIL ONLY ONE RAT LEFT. RELEASE CANNIBAL SUPER RAT . IT WILL KILL ALL THE RATS YOU FAILED TO CATCH.
CHOOSE A NAME FROM THIS LIST FOR THE RAT
1)MAUDE
2)BUBBLES
3)MISSY
4)BIG DOUG
if the rules of the contest mean it has to be 200 words exactly then assume I typed the word "rat" enough to take the word count to 200
alternate tag-lines from VEINS OF THE EARTH
"UNDERDARKEST"
"HOLE LOT OF LOVE"
"THE D"
"TOO DARK PARK"
"UNDERBELOWNEATHSCAPE"
"STONED WORLD"
"BLACK PLANET"
"THIS IS HOLE!! IT WAS MADE FOR ME!"
by people maybe I just mean me
ReplyDeleteI think I might have bought VotE faster if it said "Underbelowneathscape" on it.
ReplyDeleteI now feel waaaaaay less guilty about calling VotE by at least two of those alternate tag-lines.
ReplyDeleteI would add geese as bad and terrible feces-machines. BIG DOUG is the best name for a super cannibal-rat.
ReplyDeleteDolphins are also pretty terrible. Octopuses, fairly neutral, though a tad sociopathic.
ReplyDeleteGood saves.
ReplyDeletecorporate metaorganism isn't a subset or an overset of human I'd say, it's more a human like/descendant of humans organism operating on a different exchange of energy than us
ReplyDeleteso like an interdimensional energy alien child
>Instead of A Dracula , Sinister Spider Teen Gang.
ReplyDeleteI find Red Widows a good alternative to vampires:
The Red Widow, also known as the Spider Queen, is a malevolent species of all-female arachnid shapeshifters native to the Ravenloft. Sapient giant spiders who have the ability to assume the forms of beautiful redhaired women. In their true form, Red Widows appear as giant female black widow spiders with reversed coloration - red bodies with a black hourglass symbol on their underbelly.
Living a measly 20 to 30 years, Red Widows are usually little more ambitious than any other animal. Their food of necessity is blood; their food of choice is blood sucked from the horrified bodies of men lured into their embrace by the seductive beauty of their humanoid forms. Their usual MO is to get the sucker somewhere discrete with promises of a tryst, hold him tight, then revert to their spider form - aside from scaring the piss out of their victim, this also puts them in prime position to deliver a lethally venomous bite and commence to sucking blood.
To reproduce, Red Widows mate with humanoid men, then kill them and lay the eggs in their bodies to incubate