Sunday, 4 June 2017


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this photorealistic pokemon stuff is easy

Carrion crawler 
Egg Maker: 
It's like that creepy pokemon chansey , it hugs people and holds them in its extremely rubbery body until they are too tired to fight back , then it puts them in an egg. They will stay in the egg unharmed until hatched. This tends to cause some aspects of their personality to drastically change

Catoblepas :
Like Jellyfish but also a hot air balloon . If ruptured (which is easy to do) pops gas everywhere that brings everything to life that used to be alive , including currently being digested food, leather, dead wood, hair, old bones etc. Things brought to life that have extremely limited mobility options tend to form up with other similar organisms making colony organisms (after flopping around screaming for a bit)

Friendly civilised fellows that look like a metre long horse head walking around on their vaguely manshaped tongue, nose down. Can't talk and walk at the same time you know old chap.

A massive flea which jumps to the moon. 

Cerebral parasite :
Athletes Feet:
A symbiotic fungus that tries to help out by growing 1d4 limbs to aid in whatever task you are trying to do. They are really good at legs. Doesn't really know how to get rid of the limbs once its grown them for you , out of you

Chimera :
Platonic :
It's an animal , but the perfect absolute version of that animal. After seeing it , regular versions of that animal have a deeply unsettling uncanny valley thing for you, causing nausea,  repulsion, and hives.

Cockatrice :
Eel of the Bone
It's a shy guy that slips inside people and curls around their bones. It's harmless there , what isn't harmless is the amount of things the Eel of the Bone knows and how their dreams tend to leak into other peoples  dreams. 
These dreams also tend to let people very concerned with various questions the Eel knows the answer to get dreams about where the Eel of the Bone currently is.
And  the Eel of the Bone is honour bound to answer 3 questions of anyone who finds it inside someone.

Injustice Crab:
Why this city things an iron crab with a morning star just walking around smashing things helps the crime rate no-one knows

Crab, Crayfish, Crocodile
The cross between these 3 is obviously a walking warmachine-mulcher.
The opposite of that is 
Candy Bird:
It's a small bird made of candy that wants you to eat it. If you do all your children will be overly large violent goons.

Demon :
The opposite of Demons is going to good natured household gods. . They move into a home, house or abode and make it better and harmonious. Except they are from the wrong dimension so it's not good at all.

-- Demogorgon 
This moonfaced mitten wearing fuzzipillar pig makes you your humble home a castle. A fastly vertically , physically impossible castle. All vertical distances are increased 1000 fold. All horizontal distances 20 fold. Outside dimensions remain the same. Archiplex then tends to start inviting all his friends over

-- Juiblex 
Looks like beakless puffin.
Makes microscopic things massive (dust mites, tardigrades, fungal spores) with irregular consistency. Embiggened things tend to get smart enough to form societys but the societys tend to be Lewis Carroll /Frank Baum /Candy Kingdom

-- Manes
Like a pinecone of noses, but dumber. Does the dumbest thing possible in any particular moment

-- Orcus
Like a beetle made from alien sex toys but the aliens are prudes . Proceeds to improve everything that could be understood as a tool . Improved tools function as 1d6 other tools, roll when use to determine which tool-function happens

-- Succubus
Vix: A hairy spring man. Sews hair seeds , making surfaces grow thick deep fur , hair, or antenna. 

-- Type I (Vrock) 
A snail made of smiles! Alternates between making vast hearty feasts out of formerly inedible objects and just chasing down and eating people (Chum calls this the "washing up")

-- Type II (Hezrou) 
An luminous translucent inchworm with hand puppet face. Finds people and returns their things. 78% of the time it's things you deliberately got rid of like diseases, cursed objects, hunting animals, hair, feces etc.

-- Type III (Glabrezu) 
A tongue flower. Gives useful advice for someone not quite you.

-- Type IV (Nalfeshnee, etc.) 
A snake on assorted wheels. What fun. Not fun at all. Digs holes through space linking  your home to places you really wish it wouldn't

-- Type V (Marilith, etc.) 
 Mary Poppins. It's Mary Poppins

-- Type VI (Balor, etc.) 
Someone who looks like your dad.
The first thing you kill in house occupied by Amylnam is always Amylnam. He looks so disappointed .

-- Yeenoghu (Demon Lord of Gnolls) 
The Mister :
Mister is very thin and she has long sharp nose. She means good , as she teaches all the animals to talk and think. It's your own fault if they then slaughter and eat you though

1 comment:

  1. A rich array of monsters! \o/
    The Injustice Crab is awesome.